Monday, September 5, 2016

Getting that cycling "visa" from the wife...

The most prized Visa given to my dear buddy by his loving wife on his birthday!


Here's a big THANK YOU to our amazing wives!


Pic fm Rev Dan Lee

For those of  you who are married to a wife that loves to cycle, this blog post is not for you. You guys are so blessed as anytime you want to go for a tour, you just go with her and enjoy yourself. Please do not take this for granted and do spare a thought for us who love to jump on our bike, but we have to get the nod from our better half first. Sometimes, this is easier said than done and can be quite a challenge.


I try to do 4 major trips a year and I'm very grateful to have a wife that is very understanding and is sympathetic to my passion. However, it is a fine balancing act to make her happy as well as to make my many bicycles happy. These 2 goals seem to be in conflict with each other but it does not need to be that way if you follow closely these "time and tested" principles on how to get your cycling visa. Please don't sue me if these fail...


1.  Make her #1 in your life. Unless she knows she is more important than your bike, you are doomed before you even take the Ortlieb out of storage. The truth is that she did not need to marry you but she did. The least we can do is to cherish her decision and be diligent to make sure each day is the best day of her life. Show her that she is the reason why you work so hard, the reason why you come home, the reason why you love the kids so much. Sounds like a tall order, but if you can do this, half your battle is won. Remember "Happy wife, happy life!"


2.  Let her know that touring actually makes you a better husband and father. OK, this one sounds a bit flimsy but truly, it does! Even the best marriages need regular time out and absence does make the heart fonder. Being away from your spouse can be healthy as you do miss each other and a time of reflection and appreciation are important. I come back from tour missing my family dearly and feeling renewed, recharged and refreshed. This also is a good time for her to catch up with her friends. Needless to say, touring is a very physically healthy activity too and approved by physios.


3.  Make her a part of your tour if she is not going. Not all wives are interested, but do so anyway. Involved her in the planning, share with her who will be on the team, get her to meet them if possible. Share with her the map and the destinations you hope to visit. When you are on tour, contact her daily and update her about the happenings of each day. Be interested too in how her day went. It is important she knows that she is in your mind, not out of sight, out of mind, and be thoughtful. If possible, buy her a gift. Yes, we always give the excuse that as cyclists, our pannier are already bursting but a broach, earrings or a scarf do not take much space. O yes, it helps if you know what she likes!


For those whose wife tours with you not because she loves to but because she wants to be supportive, make sure this experience is a really special one for her. Take this opportunity to be that White Knight who carries her panniers, who fixes her bike, who serves her drinks and even throw in a massage every now and then.


I am by no means the authority on this but I hope you find these tips helpful. Would love to start a discussion and hear from you guys and gals as well. We can learn so much from each other. Talk to me.

All the best in getting that cycling visa!


Her children stand and bless her
Her husband praises her
"There are many virtuous and capable women in the world,
but you surpass them all!"

Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last
But a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.

Proverbs 31: 29,30

1 comment:

Taiwoon said...

This is an awesome entry and a valuable one indeed. Thanks Al for sharing ur secrets!